Saturday, April 20, 2013

Another Speech

The semester is winding down and with 16 credits I am finding myself occupied with school work most of the time.  Luckily it's all over by May 15th and I'll then have time to put into leisure activities like this.

I'll just put up a speech we had to give about a talent we had because I really enjoyed this one.  We've received the final speech for the class and boy howdy I am looking forward to the hilarity.  It's an 8-10 minute speech with a media component on a controversial topic.

P.S. He gave us 3 fucking pages of controversial topics.  Variety is the spice of life, eh?

I'm interested in seeing what "sources" and "facts" people use.  There's been a trend of bullshit "facts" in some people's speeches.  The good news?  I had actual facts in mine and my speeches on not having religion taught in schools and my secular agenda if I was president went over surprisingly well.

In other news work still never fails to piss me off.  Everyone is super interested in what everyone else is doing or not doing and not what they are actually getting done.  Now I admit that I am not as proactive and gun ho as I was during my first year, because why bust my ass if all that will net me is "solid performer", but I still manage to get a lot done.  Despite this the technically temp status coworker that has horrible body odor all day every day (He says he's aware of it, but I don't smell the attempts to hide it.  I can forgive you if I smell the mixture of odor and failing deodorant) feels the need to tell me I'm "lazy."  Cool story, bro.

Also, my grandmother, who turned 90 about 2 weeks ago, has taken a tumble and fractured her lower leg.  Its the type of fracture that needs surgery, but at her age and her bone strength it's looking like it's a no go.  She broke her hip a few years ago and the surgeon was concerned his pins would not stay in her thin bones.  His words were, and I quote, "Her bones are like swiss cheese."

Tied in with the whole her pretty much refusing to eat hospital food I don't see my grandmother walking again.  She was barely doing it now and if she has to spend 6 months not walking she will never get it back.  The doctors also confirmed the congestive heart failure my mother and I speculated about for a year now.  It will just be frustrating moving forward because even mentioning a nursing home just for rehab or the possibility of ending up at an assisted living place long term is met with her tearing you a new asshole.  If she can't go back to her apartment she will be absolutely miserable.

I’m not one to toot my own horn about my skills and talents.  In fact, I only tooted a horn, French horn to be exact, for a very short time in my life.  But my speech isn’t about that because it puts even me to sleep.  I’d also like to say that I have also been playing piano since I was 7, but again, that is not what my speech is about but I feel the need to point it out because during introductions a high school classmate of mine said “Who really plays the piano anyway?” and I responded “Well, I do.”          

  I come from a fairly creative family, relatively speaking, of course.  My mother is a seamstress and worked for a fashion designer in the 80’s.  She would have continued doing that if most of the work hadn’t moved to NYC as she had no interest in moving there.  During my childhood she continued to pursue creative activities that included oil painting, upholstery classes, cake decorating, and committing herself to creating extensive decorating idea folder every time she redecorates a room.  It must run in the family because my great aunt’s house is filled with her finished crochet and knitting projects, intricate needlepoint works, sheet music from when she took opera lessons with my grandmother, and when she admitted that her hands just aren’t what they used to be she gifted my mother with what is hands down the largest kitting needle collection that has ever existed… ever.         

   My father enjoys making model cars, and after almost 50 years I have to admit that he’s pretty good at it.  He’s won awards at Munson Williams Proctor Art Institute car shows.  He takes his craft very seriously, to the point of stealing my mother’s sewing thread to get the engine wires just the right color, at least until my mom told him to go get his own.       

     My sister has a degree in illustration.  She’s excellent at drawing characters and was recently hired by a small board and card game company to do original character designs.  Her portraits actually looks like the people who are supposed to be in them, and if you’ve always secretly want to see yourself drawn as an orc or and elf let me know and I’ll give you her contact information.           

So where do I come in?  I’ve mentioned my musical talents.  I’m also a mean cook and I can hem your pants without using glue.  I took a few art classes in school and I’ve had a respectable run as one of those nerds role playing in World of Warcraft.  I’m proud to announce that after a nearly 6 year stint I have given it up to pursue Simcity Urban planning and killing things on my xbox.   Other than that the only other neat hidden, but not really hidden talent is my crochet work.  I’ve been doing it since I was a senior in high school, but it’s only in the past 2 years that I have stopped sucking at it.  Youtube has taught me everything I know, which is a mixed blessing because I have absolutely no clue how to read a pattern.  I mostly make scarves and blankets, though I have promised myself to try and make a few critters this summer in a style of crochet known as amigurumi. 

  It’s a relaxing things to do during loading screens, games that require a lot of downtime, while watching tv, and while waiting for class to start.  Everything I make is given to someone immediately after its completion, and I enjoy picking out designs and colors suited for the person I am making an item for.  Handmade gifts are the best because even if they aren't perfect it’s still enjoyed because “Holy crap did you make that yourself?!”.  My grandmother showed her blanket off to anyone that stayed in her apartment long enough for her to grab it.  Her friend Grace was mighty jealous so I ended up making one for her as well.  I have a baby blanket collection running because everyone I know is getting pregnant or at least wants to.  I have sent a subtle hint to my sister that I demand nieces because so far all of hers are pink.

     I recently completed a blanket for my mother out of a very annoying yarn type.  She had one similar to it that she loved, but after my sister wrapped her dog in it things were never the same, at least when you’re allergic to dogs.  I am also halfway through a blanket for my father.  He has a blue chair he likes to sit in with a US air force rug at its feet, so this red white and blue diddy will fit right in because ‘Murica, that’s why.       

     Crochet is a craft where even if you only know a few stitches you have unlimited possibilities with stripes, colors, sizes, and patterns.  It’s easy to go back and correct things if you make a mistake, and once you get in a good groove you won’t notice the time lost from unraveling things.  You’ll get a lot of questions and comments about what you’re working on, and you’d be surprised how many people actually find it interesting and want to learn.  It’s not your grandmother’s craft anymore.  Mostly because we have better color schemes than we did in the 60’s and 70’s and a much better selection of yarn types.

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